We were all born on the same colored canvas, ready to be painted by the tones mixed on a palette that holds our future. I know that is so metaphoric but, to me, it explains how a child develops.
Genetics is a large part in our character development but the environment to which we are exposed and raised in, is the dominant factor for how we spend our adult life. Depending on the content of how a person is taught to cope -by example- with life when it throws the worst or best at you, will become a component in our circle of life that is extremely hard to break when it is necessary to do so for survival. Some things that are taught to a child become so ingrained, no amount of change to environment will erase the damage or stop what has become an involuntary personality trait (I did not learn that from a book, only what I personally found to be true)
A child’s mind is endlessly receptive with an avid curiosity about the world and a matching imagination. What is told to them is taken at face value as truth then twisted into a version of how they feel and view the world. Pouring positive ideas and answers into their minds when they ask questions or watch us interact during our daily lives, feeds the well of stored information they will pull from as they develop and grow. If it is filled with toxic or poisonous information for them to draw from then that is what will pump through their veins. We all can remember, I’m sure, being told or seeing something at a young age and believing its truth then as an adult the layers peel away to reveal the actual truth. Sometimes that truth is hard and hurtful to see so we cover it back up with comfortable lies or it can lighten our hearts and free us from a terrible burden.
There is no magic button to push that can undo what is done or an information sheet to read from so you wont make mistakes. I wish I had listened more to the words of my daughters as I wished someone had heard mine. Being a perfect parent or role model for a child is all in our heads. Humans are imperfect by nature which is why we strive to better ourselves. A child just wants to be heard. If you listen they will tell you everything you need to know about the universe with their words.
I’m a grand mother now and I absorb every word they say. I live to hear their wisdom and ideas. A child is so much wiser then any of us. They don’t hate until we teach them. They don’t judge until we show them. They don’t hurt until we give them the weapon.
My grandson talks to me about the way he sees things in the world around him and how he thinks they should be. He wants to understand and know why about everything. Lately he has taken a keen interest in my writings. He will ask questions about words he hasn’t heard before and tell me his interpretation of what I wrote. Sometimes I am taken back at what he heard in a verse that I didn’t even know was hidden beneath my words. To say I love him just won’t do justice to the feeling in my heart.
He introduced me this week to his new favorite band Imagine Dragons. We sat and watched all the videos together as he pointed out the best part of each song by serenading me with the words he knew by heart. I now have another group added to my list of favorites on pandora. When you think a love can not get any stronger……your grandson will sing you a lullaby.